Cooking School,  Diary

Mind Under Pressure

Much needs to be said about the mind games we play with ourselves and sometimes we just need to learn a new technique for winning.

Going into this, journey of cooking school, many messages of doubt were placed and stored in my mind.  I had to battle those out.

  • You’re too slow, too old and can’t drive at night.
  • It’s too dangerous for you-You’re gonna get hurt.
  • You can’t handle the pressure.
  • You’re taking from your kids.
  • You’re a bad mother for being gone 2 nights a week and every Saturday for 8 months.
  • You made a bad financial decision.
  • You’re going to struggle.

First days driving to the City (SF): I remember not wanting to be late for shadowing the program.  My knees were shaking!  The first week trying to figure out parking and timing so that I would not be late had me red in the face and heart racing.  The second week in I was feeling more comfortable driving, now without MapQuest.  I got caught in heavy traffic and my car began to overheat-for five blocks.  I had to turn off my car at every red light and pray I would make it to class.  I did, but that day it was as if my brain was in a pressure cooker and all of these negative messages kept fogging up my concentration.

My class partner must have been so irritated with me by the end of class.  I couldn’t make my conversions, I had forgotten an ingredient, and missed a step in one of the recipes.  After apologizing with a smile, he just blankly stared at me.  I could only hear those thoughts, “I told you-you couldn’t do it…” and my eyes began to moisten, I was going to lose it!

When I found the “pressure release valve,” like on my pressure cooker at home, I just let those thoughts fly out of my head like steam being released.  I gained control over my emotions by focusing on how much I want this and changing these messages of “you can’t” to “I can”!

New Technique: I start my classes, now, with positive self talk and I tap into all of the joy I get from each class!

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